Strong Debate

by joetwo

Parliament came back into session after a three month absence today. Any hopes observers had that this session would be a more civilized affair were quickly dashed as the sparks started to fly within seconds of the speaker opening the floor. Opposition leader, Deputy James Phillipson immediately got stuck into the government spokesperson, Minister William O’Brien.

“Mister Speaker! I am glad to see that the Minister has finally decided to return to us after such a long absence. Let me ask, was his delightful tan acquired at the taxpayer’s expense?”

The minister was quick in his response.

“Rest assured Deputy; myself and all of my government colleagues spent the majority of the recess attending to our portfolios. I regret I was unable to spend as much time opening public houses in the country as you were!”

TheΒ opposition leader was not impressed.

“If I required a strong drink I can tell you minister that it was due to the engrained memory of looking across the house at your deformed features these last three years. It is enough to put you off your dinner.”

The Minister responded with a full broadside.

“If anything is sickening Deputy it is having to listen to the weak drivel that passes for comment from the opposition benches. I swear a stall of mixed vegetables would make more enlightened contributions.”

The debate went downhill from there.

“I doubt the minister would recognize a vegetable if he saw one. I did not think it was possible but he looks more like a manatee now than he did when I last laid eyes on his bulbous countenance!”

Minister O’Brien delivered the final blow.

I think we can forgive the Deputy for his unkind remarks. After all; his tastes have been well documented to trend towards the, ahem, thinner gentleman.”

A strong debate broke out and armed guards had to be called to separate the belligerents.

A government spokesperson stated that Minister O’Brien was doing well after surgeons successfully removed the pencil.

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Written for Trifecta week eighty-nine.

This entry is a companion piece for an earlier trifecta entry political discourse. I found I liked writing them far too much!

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