Initiation

by joetwo

As a teen, I worked through the holidays to earn my pocket money for the next school year. One year, I was a gofor on a truck. It was an early start in the depot in the morning and we were rarely done before the evening. But I didn’t mind; the craic was mighty.

The drivers were all mad as hatters. To say they were a little crude would be an understatement. They had swearing down to a fine art. But of course where they really excelled was the drive-by letch.

Ireland, when the summer sun is out, is like God`s own country and everybody tries to get out into the sun as long as it lasts. This provides plenty of eye candy to look at on long, boring drives.

“Look at the legs on her” Tim the driver would say “You’d be all day climbing them!”

“Ah Jaysus! They’re all the same height lying down!” replied Bob, the other gofor and they both laughed.

“Look at that one! Actually, Jaysus! She’s a butterface!”

“What?!” I asked not understanding that one.

“Great body, but-her-face! Geddit?”

On my first day with them we were heading out of Dublin when we saw one particularly well endowed woman crossing in front of us. I was expecting the others to say something but instead they just looked at me. For a split second I panicked but then I came out with the first thing I thought of.

“Jaysus! You could feed a family of eight on them!”

Tim and Bob just burst out laughing “You could! But be careful not to get too close! A knock from them would put your teeth out!”

“Ah! But what a way to go! You’ll do well here son!”

We got on great for the rest of the journey, for the rest of the summer at that. I had passed their little initiation, they knew I was one of them.

After all. The team that letches together, stays together.

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Written for Trifecta Week Eighty-Four.

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